a very honest look at me right now...

So I am going to be very honest here today.... I love my kids and my family. I do, so don't take this the wrong way at all... but sometimes this life can be lonely. Yes, I have kids around me all the time, but, it is lonely. I don't have friends. Any friends that you make seem to fade as people you once knew when you have a lot of kids. When you have a bunch of kids you feel like you don't want to intrude on people, and you don't want to invade other peoples space with your many kids BC they might not know how to handle that... you feel bad and like a burden to those around you, and the people you once hung out with you don't BC then they would  have to invite the whole clan over... and that just doesn't happen much when you have a big crew like me.... so it gets lonely.. you try and make "online" friends since that way you don't have to overwhelm people with the amount of kids you have, and that just fails since not many people are real online, and many of them will just want to argue to show that you are wrong and they are right. sometimes you just want someone to talk to, and sometimes you just want someone who wont offer you advice for the things that you are going through. Sometimes you just want an ear to listen. Sometimes you just want to get away and laugh with another human being not a computer screen. Again, don't get me wrong, I love my kids, but sometimes you just want to feel like a human being and not a spit up rag... Some times you just want someone to see you for someone other than "mom". Finding friends when you have little kids is not easy. You don't ever get out, and if you do its only for a quick trip to the grocery store. Your life as a mom revolves around the little people in your life. I love these little people, but sometimes I just want to get away and be Emily... not ma, mom, mommy, Mama.... and sometimes you just don't want to hear whining all the time. So finding real friends when you h ave a bunch of littles?? NO clue how to do that.... ugh.. so sorry about my vent. Just feeling alone in this life as a mom to little kids... It is rewarding, but can def be lonely when the world is racing by you and everyone seems to be going somewhere, but you are standing still and alone... So to all you moms of little kids who might be feeling like this... your not alone... I know I am majorly blessed, but sometimes I just feel alone in this....